My daughter got a present from her mother, my ex, a fedora. It is leopard print with a pink strap. If I made one promise to myself when I decided to have a child it was that no daughter of mine will grow up wearing a fedora.
She's been wearing it around the house and almost asked if she could wear it when we went to the library. Fortunately, she decided she wanted her beanie instead, thank god I didn't have to have that argument.
She set it on the steps of the porch today and I saw my chance. I started talking to her and "accidentally" sat on it. I say accidentally because I intentionally positioned my sit bone to crush the most structurally secure part of the crown. She didn't notice at first so I used the extra time to wiggle and twist a little. It worked like a charm.
When I stood up it was mangled. Still wearable, but with a dozen or two new creases. I did my best to act surprised, and consoled her as she cried. She didn't cry that long--the dog distracted her and 10 minutes later she was fine.