Wanna share your corny dad jokes? Put them here!
Jokes
Started by Anias [2677645] on in General Non-related.
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A man was driving down the road and ran out of gas. Just at that moment, a bee flew in his window. The bee said, "What seems to be the problem?" "I'm out of gas," the man replied. The bee told the man to wait right there and flew away. Minutes later, the man watched as an entire swarm of bees flew to his car and into his gas tank. After a few minutes, the bees flew out. "Try it now," said one bee. The man turned the ignition key and the car started right up. "Wow!" the man exclaimed, "What did you put in my gas tank"? The bee answered: bp
Funny
What did the cell say when his sister stepped on his toes?
Mitosis
What did the cell say when his sister stepped on his toes?
Mitosis
What do you call a dog that can do magic?
A Labracadabrador.
Why does the crab never share?
Because he's shellfish.
A Labracadabrador.
Why does the crab never share?
Because he's shellfish.
This is a Portuguese Grim Joke so, I apologise for the rough translation.
The Joke is: "I would like to die during sleep like my grandpa, and not screaming in terror like the passangers of his bus"
The Joke is: "I would like to die during sleep like my grandpa, and not screaming in terror like the passangers of his bus"
A mother tires of her daughter shenanigans and tells her : "you know, everytime you act up I get another grey hair?" To which the daughter replies with out missing a beat "holy cow I cant imagine how awful you must of been as child, what did you do to grand ma"
A boy and his father are camping and looking at the stars. Father says : "penny for your thoughts son" son replies "I was thinking more along the lines of a dime"
A guy hits on a gal and she starts gurgling, guy asks "whats that sound" gal reploes "thats me trying to swallow that line of yours"
A boy and his father are camping and looking at the stars. Father says : "penny for your thoughts son" son replies "I was thinking more along the lines of a dime"
A guy hits on a gal and she starts gurgling, guy asks "whats that sound" gal reploes "thats me trying to swallow that line of yours"
I'm afraid my dad is not corn-like in any capacity. He is human.
[background color=var(--bbc-body-bg-color)]What did the drummer call his twin daughters?
Anna One, Anna Two![/background]
Anna One, Anna Two![/background]
Do you guys want to hear a joke about paper?..
well.. nevermind now that I think about it it's TEARABLE! haha.. ok sorry bye
well.. nevermind now that I think about it it's TEARABLE! haha.. ok sorry bye
[background color=var(--bbc-body-bg-color)]Someone complimented my parking today! They left a sweet note on my windshield that said “parking fine”[/background]
[background color=var(--bbc-body-bg-color)]Which branch of the military accepts toddlers?
The infantry.[/background]
The infantry.[/background]
Airplane donkey sandwich?