Make Property Staff Useful

We have the ability to hire staff for our properties. We have maids, butlers, guards, doctors, and pilots. Currently, only the doctors and pilots have a function aside from increasing happiness.

Let's add utility to the other 3.

One example is Guard Service in increments of 1x, 2x, 3x, 5x, and 10x. Let's make these useful and include them in the calculations to counter any attempts at using dog poop, toilet paper, stink bombs, etc.

Maids could reduce the effects of these attacks since they'd be cleaning up the aftermath.

Butlers could allow for either some task automation (buying our 100 items for us) or allowing some limited access to Torn "services" while abroad. They could move money around, pay people, accept trades on our behalf, etc. Possibly limit them with some delay to ensure they're not too overpowered.

One example is Guard Service in increments of 1x, 2x, 3x, 5x, and 10x. Let's make these useful and include them in the calculations to counter any attempts at using dog poop, toilet paper, stink bombs, etc.

That's... That's literally what they do... Like exactly what they already do.

As for maids, I don't really think that the effect is strong enough to begin with to make it worth it. Not to mention, nerfing an item that's already often difficult to use (because of those guards we mentioned earlier), just doesn't seem like the right direction.

Butlers would f**k over new players so hard if they could auto buy city items for you. They already struggle enough trying to make money, let's not make it even harder. Moving money around and paying people just hurts muggers more, and accepting trades on your behalf just sounds like abuse waiting to happen, even with a delay.

Big no.

I have yet to have a vandalism attempt fail with 10x Guard Service. So either they're useless if the person has a high Speed stat, or they don't affect the vandalism attempt at all.

For the butlers, there could be a 2% chance at the :15's to make the purchase. That way it's not overly terrible, but more of a "worth it" perk.

They most certainly do affect vandalism attempts.

You carefully move up to Major_Motoko's Private Island and plant the paper bag filled with dog poop on their doorstep. You spark your lighter and bring the flame to the paper bag. Without hesitation you knock on the door and run away as fast as you can. To your surprise, it appears as though your speed is no match for Major_Motoko as they belt out of their Private Island with a blunt object... You're knocked out cold. A sympathetic local takes you to the hospital.

(I'm so sorry Motoko)

Even at a chance, that's too powerful and screws over new players too much. The game isn't meant to be automated, and Ched has stated that many times.

EDIT: I recognise that says Motoko whacked me, not the guards, but the guards do affect it, and iirc you get arrested rather than hosped when the guards get you.