I still remember exactly the night I opened Torn for the first time. Everything outside was quiet; only the dim light from my monitor illuminated the room. I really should have been sleeping, because the next morning, my usual daily routine was waiting for me. But as so often happens, I told myself, I’ll just take a quick look.
A few minutes turned into hours.
At first, I was completely on my own. I clicked my way through missions, fought against random players, chased money, points, and that little feeling of success that made me forget everything else for a brief moment after every victory.
Deep down, I knew I wasn’t just playing. I was looking for a distraction. From my thoughts. From stress. Maybe even from myself.
Then came that invitation to join a faction. To be honest, at first I only thought about the benefits: better rewards, more protection, faster progress. Nothing special, really. But little by little, it turned into something I never would have expected.
Suddenly, there were people behind the names on the screen. People who took the time to explain things to me, even though I had no clue. People who didn’t laugh at me after I lost battles, but asked if they could help. We discussed strategies, shared resources, fought wars together, and sometimes just chatted for hours—about the game, but eventually about real life, too.
And that’s exactly what changed something inside me.For the first time in a long while, I felt like I belonged somewhere again. Not because of my skill in the game or any stats, but because I was accepted for who I am. It might sound strange, since it’s just an online game. But sometimes, in the most unexpected places, you find people who give you more support than many do in real life.
Today, I sit here and think about it often. The addiction hasn’t just disappeared—that would be a lie. There are still nights when I think about it for too long. But I’ve realized that I was never really just looking for money, points, or victories.
I was looking for connection. People who understand. The feeling of not being alone.
And that’s exactly what I found there.