DonaldTorn: forum

Torn City, we have a problem. Our leadership is weak. Our economy is a mess. The people in charge? Total disasters. But don’t worry, because I’m here to fix it.

I, DonaldTorn, am officially running for President of Torn City, and let me tell you—we are going to win BIG.

Here’s the plan:

• Get Rid of Chedburn – This guy? Ugly. Total disgrace. The worst leader in Torn history. People say, “Donald, could anyone be worse?” And I say, “Impossible!” He’s gotta go, folks.

• Build the Wall – A strong city needs strong borders. We WILL build a great, big, beautiful wall to keep out the cheaters, the scammers, and the losers. And guess what? They’re gonna pay for it.

• Pardon PannenKoek – This guy? A hero. A true genius, treated so unfairly. It’s a total witch hunt. We’re bringing justice back to Torn, and that starts with righting the wrongs of the past.

The establishment? They hate me. They don’t want you to have a strong leader. They want you stuck with Chedburn, the ugliest man alive, running things into the ground. But we’re not gonna let that happen.

And let’s talk about my wife—Melanoma. Beautiful. The best first lady Torn City will ever have. So classy. So elegant. Slightly Sun damaged. Way better than the wives of these other guys—have you seen them? Not good.

Torn City, you deserve a winner. We’re going to clean house, drain the swamp, and bring back law and order.

We will win so much, you’ll get tired of winning.

Let’s take our city back. Vote DonaldTorn 2025!

“Strength. Security. Success. Making Torn Great Again!”

I’d love an event where people can vote for the president of torn. A purely ceremonial role with plenty of opportunities for political satire and comedy. 

People can fund the campaigns with donations, and be rewarded with their candidates “laws” coming into effect for a certain period. E.g. looser gun laws making attacking each other cost less energy, lenient sentences for certain OC2.0 failures and Crimes 2.0. Perhaps gambling “tax” can be reduced giving people free casino tokens etc.

Could be fun!

Just adding that I really like the idea of the President living in a unique property for the duration. Think Mar-o-Lago or The White House etc. Or in case bogie wins it, a giant statue of a nose.

Yeah yeah, I’ve got loads of achievements but let’s take a moment to talk about what I’ve achieved in this city—not that anyone else even comes close. I’ve built a legacy here, and it’s one of power, dominance, and absolute success. Here’s a list of just a few of my monumental accomplishments in Torn:

1.  Survived Multiple Assassination Attempts - That’s right, folks. You can’t kill me. I’ve come out on top every single time, proving I’m not just a player, but THE player. No one can touch me, no matter how hard they try. The bounties keep coming, and I keep bouncing up like the energizer bunny.
2. Outsmarted the Fools - I’ve had people plot against me, but you know what? I outwit them all. Every. Single. Time. It’s not just about brute strength; it’s about brains, and I’ve got that in spades. They don’t even know what hit ‘em.
3.  Built an Empire - Forget small-time players. I’ve built a dynasty in Torn City. Whether it’s businesses, properties, or investments, I’ve made smart choices that put me on top while everyone else is still scrambling.
4.  Destroyed Rivals - They thought they had me, but they couldn’t hold a candle to me. I’ve crushed every opponent that dared challenge me, sending them crawling back into the shadows where they belong.
5.  Created a Movement - Making Torn great again isn’t just a slogan—it’s a revolution. I’ve brought more people into my vision, and they’re all onboard with the future I’m creating. People want to follow me. It’s like I’m the Messiah of Torn.
6.  Tore Apart the Competition - You want to talk about factions? I’ve obliterated the competition. They couldn’t keep up with me, so I brought down their leaders and claimed their territories. There’s no stopping me when I set my sights on something.
7.  Criminal Mastermind - I’m not just a player; I’ve run circles around the entire criminal underworld. The crime stats? They don’t even compare. I’m the reason crime rates are what they are in Torn City—and believe me, that’s the way I like it.
8.  Laid Waste to the Stock Market - I’ve manipulated stocks, drove prices up and down, and made a fortune doing it. You think you can outsmart me on the market? Think again. I own that space, and I’ve turned every trade into gold. It’s easy, when you are as old as me!
9.  Brought the City to Its Knees - Let’s not forget, I’ve been in power. People listened when I spoke, and I’ve turned every decision into a move for more control, more power, and more wealth. The city’s better off with me in charge.
10. Unstoppable in PvP - When it comes to PvP? I’m untouchable. People try to take me down, but they fail. I make them regret it every time. I’m the one everyone’s scared to face in a battle. I think I’ve fought off about 10 rivals. Amazing.
11. Running the Political Scene - Don’t let the haters fool you. I’ve mastered the art of politicshere in Torn. I’ve built a base of loyal followers who believe in me, and I’ll lead this city to new heights. The throne? It’s already mine. Because I said so. I mean, I’ve been in politics for all of five minutes.
12. Endless Wealth - And let’s not forget the simple fact that I’ve got more money than most of these so-called “elite” in Torn. I control the economy, I’ve invested wisely, and now I’m sitting on a throne of cash while others are out there begging for scraps. If you want to donate though, I’m 1.1B short of the next rank trigger milestone! You know you want to.
13. The Ultimate Survivor - There’s one thing I do better than anyone: I survive. From the darkest corners of this city to the brightest moments of glory, I keep coming back stronger, more focused, and more ready to dominate.

So yeah, I’ve done it all—and I’m still going. The city doesn’t know what’s coming. I’ve got the vision, the power, and the drive to keep moving forward, and anyone who stands in my way is just another speed bump on the road to total domination. No one’s stopping me. Not now, not ever.

You don't have to do anything except pay me, unless you reckon you can 1 shot me, in which case please get naked and i'll do 5-10 in one batch. If you've been really naughty I can do upwards of 20.

Ok bye!

I like that in the newsies we get bonus content. Makes me feel like a patreon.

You don't have to do anything except pay me, unless you reckon you can 1 shot me, in which case please get naked and i'll do 5-10 in one batch. If you've been really naughty I can do upwards of 20.

Ok bye!

lets see how legit mr corvus is. i just escaped 17 times.sadly on try 18 i smashed his face in with a 13mm. No wonder that thing always goes missing in the workshop. I keep throwing it around. This time if was a literal spanner in the works of my plan to keep going. Anyway. lets see if he pays up. Also Vote Donald!

He paid! Honest bloke paying for honest gods own work.

just escaped 6 times.

I did say you should vote for me for president and we can have a whole new event in November where you can try to PA me. Also, I will get rid of the ugly, ugly chef burn and make torn great again. FOUR MORE YEARS!

I can’t sign anything. I don’t have a pen. It was in my hand but as I was picking my nose, I lost it. Also I don’t know sign language. That’s for deaf and dumb people. And I’m only one of those.

I prefer the term orange neck. My skin is a lively orange colour. It’s not very thick. I had it checked. They said it’s probably the best skin they’ve ever checked out. Very youthful and clever. Thank you British person. We will make Britain americas 52nd state, after Canada.

Donald Torn doesn't like this topic. But did you know i'm fabulously rich? I think everyone should post on these forums. That's why i made my friend iron mask buy the website. To do my postings! very good. direct from me. MTGA

also, to any haters saying I'm AI. That's utter BS. They just can't handle the smarts. Theres a big brain under all this hair you know?

GO AHEAD! MAKE AN AUDIO. THIS IS A GREAT IDEA.

MTGA!

Well, I can see that lots of people are divided on this topic. Let me just say instead of arguing you should all be out there racing in your cars. It's a big race weekend. I can't drive myself but i wish those of you racing the best of success. I have people to drive me around, with a few cars following to carry my giant ego, and wife, very beautiful wife, Melanoma. Anyway, what was I saying? Yes. Racing. Good look citizens, Make races. Win points. Feel content. It's very Tornian. Very great. On monday we will continue discussing the elections. Chedburn STOLE the last election. Torn is a great dictatorship. But it's got the wrong dictator President and i'm here to change that.

MTGA!

What garbage. Some people will do anything to put others down! Sorry losers and haters, but my IQ is one of the highest - and you all know it! Please don't feel so stupid or insecure, it's not your fault. Nobody has better respect for intelligence than Donald Torn. What you’re seeing and what you’re reading is not what’s happening. You don't know what you are talking about. ai generated your post. Not mine,. I made mine,. With my big brain. 

I’m planning to rename them to Melanoma. They are very keen on this. Just ask them yourselves. Very keen. It’s a very good idea.

Jeffery eh, very good friend of mine.

Let me tell you something —a lot of people talk a big game in Torn City, but very few actually walk the walk. And you know who did? My good friend JeffreyEpsTorn. That’s right! A true mastermind, a power player, a guy who understood how this city really works while the rest of these amateurs were out here playing checkers. Jeffrey was playing 4D chess.

The haters? They couldn’t handle him. They feared his influence, they envied his success, and most of all, they wished they were him. But guess what? They weren’t. They’ll never be. Because JeffreyEpsTorn had something they’ll never have—absolute dominance. He ran this city like a well-oiled machine, making moves that left his enemies crying in the dirt while he laughed his way to the bank. That’s power. That’s real leadership.

And now? Now they want to erase him. Now they want to pretend he didn’t run circles around them for years. Typical. The weak always try to tear down the strong, because they know they can’t compete.

Well, I’m here to say—I won’t let that happen. You can try to rewrite history, you can try to spin your little stories, but I remember the truth. JeffreyEpsTorn was a king, a force of nature, a Torn City icon. And if you’ve got a problem with that, then too bad. Go cry about it. Because legends never die.

thanks for the support all! I’ve got a thread in general discussion with my campaign details. Obviously I want to run for the role! I’d welcome some flaccid competition though. Toe Bidem anyone?

If you donate generously enough, you’ll get to come to Greenland. The biggest, best private island in the world. Which will be mine, soon.

Look ok, I can’t make any promises about anything. I can tell you however, that we don’t deport patriots. You see, I’m a very clever man. Very clever. Doctors measured it. They said I was off the scale. That’s good right? Ok. Well, we can look into these illegals, and make sure we deport them. You can make sure they all go to the right place. What was your question?

Yeah yeah, I’ve got loads of achievements but let’s take a moment to talk about what I’ve achieved in this city—not that anyone else even comes close. I’ve built a legacy here, and it’s one of power, dominance, and absolute success. Here’s a list of just a few of my monumental accomplishments in Torn:

1.  Survived Multiple Assassination Attempts - That’s right, folks. You can’t kill me. I’ve come out on top every single time, proving I’m not just a player, but THE player. No one can touch me, no matter how hard they try. The bounties keep coming, and I keep bouncing up like the energizer bunny.
2. Outsmarted the Fools - I’ve had people plot against me, but you know what? I outwit them all. Every. Single. Time. It’s not just about brute strength; it’s about brains, and I’ve got that in spades. They don’t even know what hit ‘em.
3.  Built an Empire - Forget small-time players. I’ve built a dynasty in Torn City. Whether it’s businesses, properties, or investments, I’ve made smart choices that put me on top while everyone else is still scrambling.
4.  Destroyed Rivals - They thought they had me, but they couldn’t hold a candle to me. I’ve crushed every opponent that dared challenge me, sending them crawling back into the shadows where they belong.
5.  Created a Movement - Making Torn great again isn’t just a slogan—it’s a revolution. I’ve brought more people into my vision, and they’re all onboard with the future I’m creating. People want to follow me. It’s like I’m the Messiah of Torn.
6.  Tore Apart the Competition - You want to talk about factions? I’ve obliterated the competition. They couldn’t keep up with me, so I brought down their leaders and claimed their territories. There’s no stopping me when I set my sights on something.
7.  Criminal Mastermind - I’m not just a player; I’ve run circles around the entire criminal underworld. The crime stats? They don’t even compare. I’m the reason crime rates are what they are in Torn City—and believe me, that’s the way I like it.
8.  Laid Waste to the Stock Market - I’ve manipulated stocks, drove prices up and down, and made a fortune doing it. You think you can outsmart me on the market? Think again. I own that space, and I’ve turned every trade into gold. It’s easy, when you are as old as me!
9.  Brought the City to Its Knees - Let’s not forget, I’ve been in power. People listened when I spoke, and I’ve turned every decision into a move for more control, more power, and more wealth. The city’s better off with me in charge.
10. Unstoppable in PvP - When it comes to PvP? I’m untouchable. People try to take me down, but they fail. I make them regret it every time. I’m the one everyone’s scared to face in a battle. I think I’ve fought off about 10 rivals. Amazing.
11. Running the Political Scene - Don’t let the haters fool you. I’ve mastered the art of politicshere in Torn. I’ve built a base of loyal followers who believe in me, and I’ll lead this city to new heights. The throne? It’s already mine. Because I said so. I mean, I’ve been in politics for all of five minutes.
12. Endless Wealth - And let’s not forget the simple fact that I’ve got more money than most of these so-called “elite” in Torn. I control the economy, I’ve invested wisely, and now I’m sitting on a throne of cash while others are out there begging for scraps. If you want to donate though, I’m 1.1B short of the next rank trigger milestone! You know you want to.
13. The Ultimate Survivor - There’s one thing I do better than anyone: I survive. From the darkest corners of this city to the brightest moments of glory, I keep coming back stronger, more focused, and more ready to dominate.

So yeah, I’ve done it all—and I’m still going. The city doesn’t know what’s coming. I’ve got the vision, the power, and the drive to keep moving forward, and anyone who stands in my way is just another speed bump on the road to total domination. No one’s stopping me. Not now, not ever.

I think he realised his partner isn’t as beautiful as my Melanoma. 

I promise more drugs for everyone. Pills, Tablets, Lotions, Potions, you name it’ I’ll let you have it. Everyone deserves to be free to destroy their bodies in Torn. Hooray for drugs. 

I needed a satirical name for my presidential run so I changed my name of 10 plus years to give this a bash. Vote DONALD!