You walk along a deserted road in Torn City bored and wishing you were not
Suddenly you jump as you hear a noise and see a flash of light in the shadows
Investigating you find an old battered Vending Machine humming like an old discarded fridge
Its old and its window is too stained and full or grime to make out whats behind it.
You notice a slot that simply says *Insert Coin*
Fishing in your pocket you pull out a coin and tentatively place it in the slot
The vending machine shakes and sparks from its top and out pops..
A rather disgruntled little man who seems to be mumbling about deleted forums and kicks you in the shin before walking away..
.........................
The game is easy just tell the person above what they got and try your luck by *inserts coin*
..........................
*inserts coin*
"Howdy stranger", said the machine before warning you that there isn't room in this town for the two of you.
The machine demands that you draw but you are unarmed. After many demands from the ominous beast you raise your gun shaped hand toward the glass.
The machine, exasperated, shoots a pencil into the tray. Another loud demand, "DRAW!".
*inserts coin*
A tub of used frying pan oil with plenty of future potential
*Inserts Coin*
A large box, which contains a medium box, which contains a small box which contains a golden egg pops out.
"inserts coin"
A small woman emerges with a mani/pedi kit in hand.
*inserts coin*
Plink!!!!
A tray of tokens from The Golden Nugget
(Insert Coin)
I pop out of the machine and start dancing because I'm glad we have our vending machine back! LOL And then I hand you my slip resistant shoes because I no longer need them since I'm no longer a waitress! LOL
*Insert Coin*
*mmph*
The machine had a moment of clarity and dropped a 12 oz. can of ice cold Coke.
*inserts coin*
A scale model of the Eiffel Tower constructed entirely of toenail clippings
*Inserts Coin*
The machine pops and smokes and nothing happens. As you reach to your pocket for another coin to give it another try you notice a sign in very small print. it reads OUT OF ORDER.
*inserts Coin*
You hear a rumble and the noise gains strength, it builds and you start looking for an exit.
There are no exits; No windows, doors or floor/ceiling exits. DrZed did used to leave logical ways to exit such rooms, but that ship has sailed.
You imagine this freight train rolling inside the machine and that's when you cower.
*plop*
A single drop of water falls before it becomes a fine trickle. You wet your pants, just a little, and the machine stops the rumble and returns to the slight buzz it normally carries.
*inserts coin*
The buzz grows louder and louder until it sounds like a giant kazoo combined with a full blown hurricane, as dimensions of space and time intertwine. Suddenly all is silent and you hear a small "pop".
From the vending machine bursts forth a small wooden chest which lands in front of your feet. You can't be too sure, but the wood it's made from looks suspiciously like sapient pearwood.
The chest raises off the ground a bit, supported by hundreds of tiny feet. It turns and presumably faces you, although the lack of any facial features makes it hard to tell. Still, you are pretty sure it is giving you a calculated once over.
It turns abruptly and scurries of, presumably looking for someone. Just before it gets out of sight you notice a small label attached to it that reads "copyright Terry Pratchett".
"Inserts Coin"
The machine heaves and groans and the slot widens and gives birth to a funny little man in some kind of wizards attire.
He stands up and brushes himself off "Hi, My name is Rincewind have you seen a chest around here? oh never mind i can hear its trail of destruction" and he runs off holding his robes up around his knees like a dress.
You are not 100% sure but he seems to have a label stuck to his ass that says"copyright Terry Pratchett".
"Inserts Coin"
A small envelope floats down into the vending machines tray. Upon opening it you find an "Insewerants Certificate for one Vending Machine owned by one -AR-Voidflake". You read the small print and are pleased to find that not only does it cover for fire, flood and damages, but also wanton acts of destruction by the many vengeful, angry and clumsy Gods.
*Inserts Coin*
A hologram of Shirley Temple, the later years, begins to sing and dance to Good Ship Lollipop. The sweet and in innocent number is lost with the elderly woman.
*inserts coin*
$15 worth of fireworks. Be careful, some of them are illegal in some states.
*insert coin*
A Lucerne Hammer
(Insert Coin)
An unoped copy of Get Rich or Die Tryin' for sensory overload.
*inserts coin*
A flask of Universal Solvent.
(Insert GP)
You've gone and upset the machine.
The machine splits in two, your body collapses, your mind opens to the machine and it sucks you in.
The coin you used can only be redeemed inside and once you're in, you know there is no way out.
* inserts coin*