Duke's Valentine's Day Charity Drive

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duke if you are reading this can you give me the max loan of 10 billion cause i sent 40m by mistake

Is today WHO's day? what is Vanlentine's day? Maybe that why my wife is pissy today.O-well maybe i do some thing special tomorrow like go swimming get out of her hair

i know it says within 24 hours but are there more people to confirm this is real?

So my Valentines story is pretty messed up, It was with my last girlfriend over a year ago. I had planned a whole day for us. First we would go for seaweed baths to start off the day, Then some horse riding on the beach and so on, You can imagine how much this was costing me. But anyways I went to pick her up from her parents house (from what she thought would have been 10am) but me being me wanted to go early to surprise her with breakfast, So when I got to the house I seen her parents were gone so I just went in the back door, When I got in I heard some pretty wired noises from upstairs, at first I though it was her brother and his girlfriend, so I carried on upstairs to her room, when I realised the noise was coming from her room, at that moment I freaked out and kicked the door open to find her parents doing the nasty business on her bed... long story short, didn't see them under the covers at first so thought it was someone else and started kicking them... and then soon stopped when her father pulled his head out from under the covers.. I then thought the worst and that she was too under there, so started kicking and punching this time (probably looked funs as shit) until the neighbour poped her head out and started screaming...as soon as I seen her I looked around the room realised this was not their house and quickly ran away... And got arrested shortly after.. and my Girlfriend broke up with me because I missed Valentines day.

Ohh and the crazy thing is that's not even the worse Valentines day ive had... Defo in Top 10

Roses are red,

Violets are pricey,

Free flowers from an accident blackspot,

That'll do nicely!

I decided to surprise my boyfriend for Valentine's Day. I drove 2 hours to pick up this gorgeous girl pal of mine, we drove another 2 hours to get to his place. After a 3-way that went on for hours, me and my girl took a bubble bath while my boyfriend went and got us roses. 3 minutes before midnight, he broke up with me. Yeah.

I roll with the punches, though - I told him it was all good, sure we could still be friends... after he fell asleep, me and my girl took his beer and his stash and drove off.

Story

This is a story that is...well I will let you decide, but one that goes down a treat at party's.

I had been seeing a girl for a few weeks 5 or 6 years ago (we lived in student halls together and had hit it off). It was Valentines day and being the organised character I am we didn't book a table. We wanted romantic and Italian. We ended up with average cafe style Indian.

We had a great night and went to the club after, had a few Pina Colada and headed home to finish the night off, so to speak. I will spare the details but we had a good time.

I woke up the next morning and the girl was gone... No wonder, The bed was covered in a dark brown substance, down my arms and all over the sheets. I was dry heaving when washing my arm...and now I had to clean up. F***! Curry and Pina Colada's was a bad idea - no wonder she had left.

All is well that ends well though.. after my initial horror I realised that there were 2-3 large dairy milk wrappers spread round the bed... my vauge memory remembers attempting to eat these as a snack when we come in. We must have forgot all about them..cut to the chase and then fell asleep on top of them. The girl I was seeing woke up.. thought I had Sh!t myself and didn't want to cause me embarrassment. What a star.

anyways, we stopped seeing each other shortly after this, even though it was chocolate. for a brief second/days we both thought that one another had sh!t the bed. Lets hope this year is less eventful!

It isnt aprils fools day yet. i hope you lemmings arent actually sending any play money.

Shakes head....... yep i did man lol. Oh well easy come easy go.

imagine what would happen if it was true. hundreds of nooblets would spam away $billions on blackjack which they could never pay back and then quit the game.

this is just like the spam thread duke made in september last year where he convinced field mice to send him play money so your anonymous mails will remain anonymous.

its just fun spam.

duke isnt staff, hes just a character, a loan shark character and loan sharks arent nice in real life.

be careful.

Hey Duke!

Bite me would you!

:D

wish i would have thought that way before i sent the money

I once touch a cow on Valentine's day.

Could be worse. You could be PMS'ing.



[image: i1.wp.com]

So Duke is stealing from up nooblets.
For shame.

I always miss the "specials" shit and this morning decided to check make sure im not missing anything for valentines day.
Actually got sucked into this hahhahaha. Never again Dukey never again.

hes using our cash to fund the price for the comp

Dating disaster

I went out with a guy that my roommate set me up with for valentines day a few years ago.

Firstly, he was vocally irritated that I wore heels because it made him 'shorter than me' (i'm 5ft 4 without heels). Note, he was still taller than me by a few inches. Dinner went alright, although we didn't have a whole lot in common and then had the audacity to suggest that i should have a salad.. I decided to have the most expensive thing on the menu and then left half the plate. Anyway, after dinner, we met back up with my roommate and her boyfriend and all went to a house party with their friends, where I basically knew nobody. At the party, my date's ex-girlfriend was there. To summarise, she called me a whore, threatened to fight me,spilled my drink on me, told me she gave him herpes, left, came back an hour later looking for me, hugged me, grabbed my ass, apologised and then told me I was hot.

I never spoke to him again.

I sent him 100mil for the max. Haha, but u still gotta wait the 24hrs like he's said to see if he's scammed us...