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Grave please

Started by CoolguyRuler [2183404] on in Graveyard.

23 replies · 476 views · thread synced · 5 days ago · View on torn.com
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CoolguyRuler [2183404] · #1 · edited
Everyone is focused on the recent update that added ASS to the game, and many are also hoping for the addition of TIT and PUS, among others. While everyone has been secretly wanking to this new update, like the sage I am I went deeper into the more important updates instead of eyeing the candy.

According to Chedburn, the most important change was the least noticeable unless you read the announcement page, which has a couple paragraphs marked in bold black letters that you'd have to be blind to miss. It is a change in update patches, which will now happen whenever he feels like releasing them and not just on Tuesday. This means that if he makes a change to an abused system, those people will receive a spanking for their crime without prior notice(granted those who abuse don't read warnings to begin with)

Easily the most noticed change was the inclusion of ASS in our stock market. You are all sexperts on it by this point so I'll skip that change.

Now we get into the meat, Chedburn loves to nerf inactivity, and boy he has a killer for you today. Players can no longer take infinite hiatuses in starter jobs as per this change:
"- Added system to fire people from starter jobs after 400 days of inactivity"
Good or bad? you decide whether this change is pleasurable or not.

Here's the true climax of the weekly updates, The inclusion of more electronics items that give happiness. Even if you're at the stage where you don't need happiness, using these are sure to put a smile on your face.

After these spicy updates you can cool down knowing that the rest of the patch list is just bugfixes, pretty exciting session eh? Either way yall are perverts and this thread is clean is every possible way and I hope you are chastised after reading this.

Until next time.

This was meant to be comical but people are taking it way too seriously.
Bumfluff [969606] Wiki Contributor · #8
I have no idea what you’re talking about - ASS, TIT and PUS would be stock acronyms.

I don’t see how that’s perverted… unless you are the one with a filthy mind turning it into something it’s not?
SlimGoodbody [2676196] · #9
"According to Chedburn, the most important change was the least noticeable unless you read the announcement page, which has a couple paragraphs marked in bold black letters that you'd have to be blind to miss. It is a change in update patches, which will now happen whenever he feels like releasing them and not just on Tuesday. This means that if he makes a change to an abused system, those people will receive a spanking for their crime without prior notice(granted those who abuse don't read warnings to begin with)"


And where exactly upon the body will that spanking take place, d'ya think?
iribuya [2103695] · #17
All I saw was crime 2.0 mentioned 50% more then last week, so in that rate we'll have crime 2.0 before my caymans bank investment is doubled.
SkinnyPeen [2176021] · #19
I like that he now has simple git work flow.

For I am a simple git.

Hopefully this means he will employ me. I bet their windows taste divine. Like alprazorlam and sweat.