Kitten Escapades

So I had to share this, because I've been cracking up about it all day.

I foster kittens for a local cat rescue. Once they are deemed friendly enough or likely to settle within a two week time frame, the rescue gets them a great home and as I like to check the new owners out, I do the homing myself.

Yesterday, Little Ems and Little Meg were heading off to their new forever home. They only spent 5 weeks with me, and came on in leaps and bounds, turning from frozen in fear to confident happy affectionate little souls. The lady adopting them (an English teacher) lives in a fantastic flat on the 3rd floor of a converted Victorian mansion. She is lovely, well used to timid cats and ever so excited for her new arrivals. She had gone to great lengths to kitten proof the flat, keeping everything they needed in the living room. She had nicely decluttered and removed plants and breakables and spent a fortune on cat beds/cat trees and lots of toys. I stayed an hour or so, did all the paperwork with her, and coaxed the kittens out of their carriers. As expected, they skulked off to the nearest safe space; behind the couch.

I wished the lady well, and expected a general 'timid kitten' update the next day.

7.30am I get a phone call. I've not been sleeping well, and I was in the depths of a dream.

"The kittens have gone up the chimney."
"There is a lot of soot on the floor."
"I've taken all the furniture out of the room"
"What do I do?"

I mumble something about looking for them again, and the panic in her voice cracks. "I've looked everywhere. I will call the fire brigade. What if they've fallen off the roof and are hurt?"

Of course I drive over. The kittens know my voice, if they have fallen off the roof, there is a very small chance they might respond to me. I spot some roofers starting work next door and I stop the car, and wave at them, then shout about needing them for a cat. They ask where and I point to the towering houses. They laughed. Nope.

I headed in, and am greeted by a frantic teary-eyed woman in her PJs, smudges of soot over her face, and a big angry red mark on her cheek. She had borrowed a neighbours ladder to see if the kittens had made it to the top shelf of the built in shelves and then fallen. There was soot on the floor, the furniture was in disarray. and there were black sooty paw prints over - everything - .

After ten minutes of chatting rubbish in a squeaky 'I love you kittens' voice, peering up into the darkness of the chimney and shaking munchies. I was beginning to think about the RSPCA and the fire brigade. And then, my eyes fell upon the cupboards. Hah. I recalled the conversation Kitten Mum and I had yesterday where I had informed new kitten Mum that the cupboards would be the perfect place for kittens to hang out until they were chilled and relaxed DESPITE the 3 cat beds and 2 cat blankets we'd carefully placed in more convenient locations.

Hrmph.

I sat on the floor behind the couch which was now in the middle of the room. I peered into the cupboards. Nothing.
I moved a big gift bag.
I moved some weird wooden hoops, and an embroidery box.
All the while, I'm sing-songing in my squeaky high pitched voice, "Little monkeys, Meggsieee, Emmm.. are you in here... come on you (LITTLE BASTARDS) say hello."

A pair of giant unblinking eyes gazed at me from the blackness.

"Hello, my sweetie." I murmured.

I moved another bag to reveal a familiar stripy body, pressed against the body with the huge eyes.

"You pair of f**kas." I whispered. I gave their sooty coats a little stroke, and put the bags back.

Kitten Mum burst into tears.

I think I'm going to become a dog person!

((Pics of the little darlings when in my care)

[image: profileimages.torn.com]

[image: profileimages.torn.com]

Lol thank you for the ameowzing cat tail (tale) I'm glad the kitties where found. :')

I remember ( 2020 ) when I adopted the first kittens I've ever had, they kept me on the edge of my seat all the time, even grown they are still mischievous little fellas.

Your first ones definitely keep you on edge! I was clueless with my first. I knew so little but he still survived until nearly 19 so I guess I did something right! :D

I was always so used to dogs which my mom & dad got while I was growing up, when I got the kittens I was like " You feel like you have bird bones! " I wanted to wrap them in bubble wrap, I was convinced for awhile they would end up killing themselves, they'd climb everything, barely the size of a water bottle but practically walking on the ceiling. I often thought " cats are supposed to be lazy! Please sleep before you hurt yourselves climbing stuff " lol I'd get relieved when they'd come pass out on my lap. I definitely & quickly learned a puppy & a kitten are even more different than I suspected. But low-key I think they where well on their way to being feral, it took along time when they where babies to get them to warm up to me, felt defeated the first two weeks and was regretting my decisions for a bit. In 2021 when my boys where 1 in some months. I got a girl kitten out of a bad situation and then someone from my family didn't want the girl kitten they got, so I ended up with two kittens again rather fast after my boys. Completely different experience they where lovely dovey right off the bat, in didn't want to climb anything. My lap and food was what they wanted :') sorry for my cat life story hahaha ( before getting the girl kittens, my mom had a elderly cat legit jump into her jeep at a dollar general parking lot, she brought home to me. She was so loving and like one of the sweetest cats ever, she was only with me for 4-5 months then passed away. I was destroyed for a good bit after that, I ended up getting the girl kittens after like 2 months, kinda rebound pets even though you aren't supposed to do that. But they get the same amount of attention as the boys. But more hahaha because they actively seek attention more than the boys. ) Okay shutting up now I'm sorry, I keep seeking a crazy cat friend IRL haven't found one yet. My ten year plan is to open and run a cat cafe lol.

Rofl, over the years I have learned that cats and kittens, although very capable of getting into trouble, often only pretend to be in trouble to (ab)use our natural tendency to worry about them and get attention or treats. I knowingly and willingly fall for it every time though ;)