Lewiston

I didn't really know where to post this so I dropped it here, hopefully that's alright.

I live in Lewiston Maine, a city that ranked 5th safest city to live in the US until two days ago. I got bowling infrequently, but enough that I'm familiar with the places that were attacked this week. Shootings like this always happened "Somewhere else" never here. Even violent incidents are so rare they're subject to being long term gossip events. I go shooting on my private range every other week or so, so guns aren't a terrible mystery to me, and hunting season you always hear shots. It's terribly normal to get point where you don't think about it anymore.

Now? I want to feel safe, I want to be practicing daily, but I also know that even the sound of shots would pull at an open wound in our city. I want people in my circle to feel safe at my house, but I have no idea how anyone can at this point. I'm conflicted, I know so many gun owners who I trust implicitly, but now I feel like we're all giving each other second glances. Just to be sure. My wife is terrified, we saw his car blitz past our house, and at the time we thought it was people fleeing, now we know that's half true. I don't think she'll go outside to enjoy her hammock alone ever again, and that has crushed my spirit.

I guess, what I'm asking and what I think I'd like to discuss is how do you move on from something like this? How do people heal a shattered community? I'm donating blood, I've checked in daily with everyone I know, I've talked endlessly with everyone to make sure they're doing ok. But I don't feel like I'll ever REALLY feel safe again.

Please, I don't want a gun debate here. Keep that in politics and law, I might even join with my hot take. I just want to know that it's possible to recover from something like this. That things might be normal again.

Thank you for listening.

You can get one of these online for around £1000

[image: www.theknightshop.com]




On a more serious note - Don’t worry about things that are out of your control.

hope your ok

im sure it will be possible given enough time, but as you said lewiston maine is the 5th safest city in the US, but even the 5th safest isnt safe while your leaders do nothing about guns

wont turn it into a gun reform debate we all know thats pointless.

but given time she will be back on that hammock,

stay safe

You've had an isolated incident in what has been ranked an incredibly safe area. Not trying to downplay the impact of what must have been an horrific incident for the entire area, but this was the act of one person.
It's not like the safety levels have dropped consistently, it's a single act that is exceptionally unlikely to happen again.
As said above, you can't control the chances of an individual to do something awful, so you need to try and continue as normal.

The advice so far seems pretty sound. I'm trying to stick to my normal routine, but Christ it feels like I'm eyeballing every single bush and shrub like it contains Michael Myers. Trying to find normalcy is hard, when normal for me involves going out to the places where this happened.

Shut up

Definitely sounds like you need to talk with somebody about how you're feeling so you can hopefully learn how to move forward from it better.

The saying "You will get over it" mostly isn't true - Example being: When a loved one passes you never "get over it" you just learn to handle it better.

Same goes with Veterans suffering from PTSD, most will never be "cured" even if they're regularly seeking mental health support - They simply learn how to handle it better.

You'll never get over it, the town and it's people will never get over it. But over time you will learn to accept it.

I think when they find and catch this asshole everybody will feel safer instantly. Your wife will be back on the hammock again.

I feel for you and everybody in Lewiston. I can't imagine what you are all going through and the rocky months of recovery ahead.

Sending all love from Canada x

And this is particularly why these people target "safe" places.

People get traumatized from these a lot easier in safe regions, and the wound sticks longer.

I live in a Canadian city with stabbings a plenty, and it's at a point where most of our city is pretty desensitized to it.

Thank you, it's silly, but hearing responses like this really helps. I think I'm settling into the idea that while eventually things will become normal-ish again, the scars will linger in there city.

It's rough, because usually we'd do big community gatherings to offer food and comfort, but it's absolutely the last thing to be doing right now.

I just want them to find the guy so we can start repairing the damage.

As someone who lives within 30 minutes of Maine, I was very scared when I heard the news and I can only imagine how you feel. Don't worry, they'll catch the man, and you can stop living in fear. For now, don't go to crowded places.

I live next to a city with a horrible school shooting some years ago. Lots of souls were killed that day. My kid is in exactly this school for sport, it’s always bit of stone in my stomach when I bring it take her

there is no safe place on earth, when people life there

I'd only suggest two thinks, one is to not live life in fear of what could happen because you have no control over over anyone else than yourself. Secondly Marcus Aurelius have some decent ideas to study when it comes to dealing with life.

For me exercise helps. I believe it burns off nasty stress chemicals your body throws out when something horrible is happening. Exercise hard, high intensity short time. Good luck.

Accept what happened, grieve for those who were lost with your community and take back the feeling of control by doing the things you love doing.( Exclude the range for a bit like you said for the sake of your community) I live in Maine as well, we are a hearty group here and can't let the act of 1 ill man change the way we live. There were plenty of ways to prevent this and the system failed.

Just got to live your life and accept bad things happen.