Newer player? Start here!

**Hiring Bonus for 1700+ Int or 1200+ Man!**

Are you a newer player? Do you have at least 565 combined work stats or a few EE merits? Want to work for a company that will help you grow your work stats fast for free just by logging in every day? Got a team based mindset that cares more about helping each other grow than personal gain? Are you curious about how running a company works?

Come work with us at Generica, one of the clothing stores of all time! The idea is that we run the company together while we all increase our work stats, make some friends, and help each other with work perks and more! I'll give you a starting salary of 25x your primary work stat plus a little bonus for the next 3 people who join with the right requirements.

At the clothing shop, you can enjoy

Endurance trains for 10 JP and

a passive 25% Dex buff once we get to levels 3 and 5, and at level 10 we get a 20% Armor Bonus!

If you're looking for something stable where we all help each other grow and learn about the company aspect of Torn I'd love to have you aboard! 

565 combined total work stats required, with a prerence for 375 Int and 188 End. This can even be lower if you have Employee Effectiveness merits, so send me a message or apply below if you want to discuss working together!

https://www.torn.com/joblist.php#!p=corpinfo&ID=128013

We have apparel (apparently) that we sell to the invisible numbers good citizens of Torn! Come be a part of that new "homeless chic" fad everyone is raving about on social media!

An (allegedly) real review from a Torn customer about the Gryp-Ryte All-Terrain Jesus Gliders, now in stock at Generica:

Rating: ★★★★★

Crossed the Red Sea and didn't even get my socks wet

"I strapped these leather platforms onto my feet and immediately gained the ability to tread on liquid, soft mud, and legos without feeling a thing. The thick, rubberized treads grip the earth with the desperation of a drowning man. I wore them to a formal black-tie wedding; the bride cried, not out of insult, but because she realized her marriage would never match the unshakeable bond between my toes and these arch supports."

Did you know that a Torn Citizen is one clothing size smaller than the national average? This isn't because of genetics, but because of all the drugs being used.

At Generica, we applaud the ingenuity of our customers! (Generica does not accept returns for any items after purchase.)

Champ-Yawn Heavy Cotton Sweats (Sweat Pants)

★★★★☆

Absorbs 98% of tear gas

"I was standing outside the bank during a riot, minding my own business eating a churro. The SWAT team unleashed a chemical cloud, and all I could think of was to take my sweatpants off and tie them around my face like a mask. These pants soaked up the gas like a sponge! My legs were numb for a week, but my pants smelled like peppermint. I haven't tested them after a large Taco Hell order yet. Will update after."

My mommy says you can't make everyone happy, and at least the ferrets are warm.

Hanes-In-Cuffs Cotton Crewneck (T-Shirt)

★★☆☆☆

Shrinks faster than my bank account

"Washed it once and now it fits my emotional support ferrets. Great for ferrets, terrible for a 200lb bouncer."

We at Generica would like to remind everyone that we are, in fact, a clothing store and not a Detective Agency and this man cannot reveal anyone's battle stats

Polo Ralph-Lauren-forcement Officers Polo (Polo Shirt)

★★★★★

Free coffee everywhere

"The little embroidered guy on the chest isn't playing polo, he's holding a nightstick. People constantly mistake me for an undercover detective and keep giving me free donuts and skipping line at the DMV."

At Generica, we offer tailoring so sharp your clothes will feel like a second skin!

Wrung-ler Acid Wash Jeggings

★☆☆☆☆

The acid is actual acid

"Put these on and my leg skin melted directly into the fabric. I am now 30% denim. On the bright side, I never have to buy pants again because they are part of my biological organism."

Levi-athan 501 Stabbing-Resistant Denims 

★★★★★

Knife-proof denim is real

"A guy tried to poke me with a screwdriver outside the casino. The screwdriver snapped in half, and the energy reflected back, knocking him into a coma. These jeans are forged in asbestos and spite."

Bump!

Sweet Sleeping Sylvia Baby Sleeper
★★☆☆☆

Needs an extra hole

My child was born with a third arm. How rude that these onsies don’t accommodate him!

Ooo look! Another bump! 

Generica Budget Tread Flip-Flops

★★★☆☆

Good for throwing at small mammals

"Bought these for $3.20. Threw one at an alley cat, and it shattered like safety glass. Used the other as an emergency spatula at a block party. They do the job if you don't expect to live past Tuesday."

Look over there! It’s a bump! 

Bumping for great justice 

Let me see dat, underwear for adults

★★★★★

Sisqó knows what’s up!

“She had dumps like a truck, truck, truck
Thighs like what, what, what
Baby, move your butt, butt, butt
Uh, I think I'll sing it again (c'mon)

She had dumps like a truck, truck, truck
Thighs like what, what, what
All night long
Let me see that thong (c'mon)

Baby (girl, I know you wanna show da na da na)
That thong th-thong, thong, thong
I like it when the beat goes (da na da na)
Baby, make your booty go (da na da na)
(Girl, I know you wanna show da na da na)
That thong th-thong thong, thong (uh, listen)”

I am new, and my stats are very low, 814 total. Looking for someone to give me an opportunity to grow and enjoy this game.

Hire that noob! 

… says the noob.