I am creating this thread so all can come and enjoy a good laugh! Come to read or come to add a new and funny Dad joke! Nothing will brighten up your day better than a Dad joke that makes you groan but smile as well! Everyone knows a good Dad Joke!
I'll get the ball rolling by adding some of my favorites.
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Man, when you have a bladder infection......
Urine trouble
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What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef
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Why didn't the toilet paper cross the road?
Because it got stuck in the crack!
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I was thinking about moving to Moscow.......
But there's no point Russian into things.
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Two guys walk into a bar.......
The third guy ducks.
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What did the cheese say after it made the free throw shot?
Swisssssss
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Now it's your turn to post! I'll come back from time to time and add some new ones. Lets make TORN City cry laughing!
Hello my fellow Torn Racing enthusiasts! I'm here to ask the question, what makes Fast and the Furious such a good movie? Other than the fast cars and racing scenes. The friendly banter and trash talking the actors dish out. Wouldn't it be fun for us, the racers of Torn to do the same thing with a Racing Chat box that appears once you enter a race, Official or Custom.
The chat window would work similar to the other chat windows we have access to:
Global
Trade,
Jail,
Hospital
Travel
Competition
We'd be able to disable or enable the Racing window like the other windows. This would give the player something to do while waiting for the race to start and while the race is in progress, as well as giving us Torn players options. So hit that like button and let Ched know we Racers want to chat.
With travel such a key element in TORN, what if each destination you can travel to, had its own city map you could open with a chance of spawning an item, and the more you travel to one destination, the more familiar you get with it and have a higher chance of finding better items.
Items spawned would depend on where you travel to. This feature would make traveling more interesting, rather than being a boring tedious grind!
Torn such a fun immersive game to play. It allows you to play the game the way you want to, and how you want to; there is no wrong way. Either for leisure or for power Torn is a game for all. You can unlock metals and honors to show off to your Faction and friends. Heck there are even titles you can earn, so other players can get a glimpse of how you play. But don't you wish there was more to titles than just a name under your Rank? I know I do, so I have added advantages and disadvantages for almost every Title in Torn. I tried to keep them all with small %'s so not one is too OP.
You only maintain the advantages and disadvantages for as long as you maintain the Title, once you earn a new Title you will lose the bonuses from the previous title and start earning the bonuses from the new title.
These are all up for discussion and changes can be made, I encourage criticism. This is to make a great game even better. If you can think of a good bonus for the Titles that have no bonus please post it and I will update it. Thank you.
Titles:
Accomplice: Attacks assisted, 1% Extra Respect gained for assisted attacks Addict: Times overdosed, Can no longer be revived after ODing. Alcoholic: Alcohol items used, 3% Extra Nerve gained for drinking alcohol, but Lowers Crime Success rate 1%. Antagonist: Defends won, 3% increase to Defense, Bondsman: People bailed, Decreases amount needed to bail someone out by 3%, but increases the amount someone needs to pay to bail you out by 3%. Booster: Stat enhancers used, 1% discount when purchasing Stat Enhancers, but gym gains decrease by 5% when trained at a gym. Boxer: Hand-to-hand finishing hits made, Hand-to-hand attacks deal 10% more damage, but weapon accuracy is lowered by 10%. Buster: People busted, Increases Busting success rate by 5%, but Decreases your chances of being Busted out by 5%. Coward: Times run away, 3% boost to Speed, -3% to Defense. Citizen: New player who hasn't made any actions. No bonus. Damage Dealer: Total damage dealt, 3% bonus to weapon damage, gives .5% more respect when beaten. Deserter: Be inactive for 30+ days, Increases the amount of money mugged off player by 5%. Druggy: Drugs taken, Drugs give double the effect, but with a 3% higher chance of ODing. Egotist: Bounties placed, No fee for placing Bounties anonymously. Felon: Times jailed, All Battle Stats increased by 1%, but all Work Stats decreased by 1%. Healer: Revives done, Health boosted by 3%, lowers cool down for medical consumables by 1%. Hitman: Bounties claimed. Increases the amount of a Bounty by 2%, All Bounties placed on you gain an additional 2%. Hoarder: Points bought, Decreases the cost of buying points by 2%, All Points Building purchases are increased by 5 points. Importer: Items bought abroad, 3 additional items can be bought abroad. Intimidator: Foes ran away, Gain Respect each time a Foe runs away (respect is equal to the respect gained for defeating the Foe). Investor: Money invested in bank, Gain an additional 2% when investing money. Jobsworth: Times trained, Gain 5 extra Work Stats when trained, but player can only login once a week. Killer: Attacks done, Gain an additional 3% to gym gains. Loser: Attacks lost, Gym gains are decreased by 5% Marksman: Critical hits done, Increases Critical chance by 3% Medalist: Awards earned, Increase all merit bonuses by 1%. Mercenary: Contracts completed, Gain extra Mission credits based off the difficulty of the mission. Merchant: Auctions won, No bonus Mobster: Organized Crimes participated in, Gain an additional 2% Respect and Money for each successful OC you are a part of (this can be stacked for each participant with the Mobster title), Reward for being arrested increases by 3%. Newcomer: New player with age 7 days or 7-30 days with no action, No bonus Nudist: Unarmored fights won, Gain 5% to armor rating for each piece of armor not worn. Critical hits deal 2% more damage. One Hit Killer: One hit kills, All attacks deal 2% more damage, All attacks dealt to you deal 2% more damage. Outcast: Receive bounties, Increases Defense by 2% for each Bounty on your head, Increases Hospital stay by 2% for each claimed bounty. Punching Bag: Defends lost, Defense decreased by 3%. Samaritan: Items sent, All damage dealt to a Samaritan, reflects 2% of that damage back to the attacker (up to 3 attacks). Sage: Time Played, Get a 1% increase to all of your current perks, and stats. Scavenger: Items found in the dump, Receive 1 additional item each time the dump is searched Silent Killer: Stealth attacks done, Unlocks a backstab option during an attack, it can only be used 1 time, but if it is successful increases Critical damage by 50%. This option is locked for 12 hours for each non-stealth attack that is won. Slayer: Best killstreak achieved, Respect increases by 2% for each streak of 10 (caps out at 100%), player to break the streak gains built up Respect. Soldier: Respect gained, All Faction perks are increased by 3%. Socialite: Messages sent, No bonus. Tank: Fights stalemated, Every successful hit increases Defense by 1%. Thief: Money mugged, Increases the amount of money mugged by 2%, Lose an additional 2% when mugged. Tourist: Times travelled, Decreases flight times by 2% (stacks with WLT BB) Trader: Trades done, Gain mug protection for each successful trade. Tycoon: Bazaar customers, Receive 2% more money for each item bought from your bazaar.
Pack your fedora and whip because you're going to channel your inner Indiana Jones! It's time Torn comes out with a new company and that company should be able to run a University! Directing a successful University will not be an easy feat to accomplish not only will you need the basic courses and Stock benefit blocks completed and owned but to make it worth your while, the History Education course will also need to be completed. This Company will work hand in hand with History and having the Museum unlocked; because artifacts will play a big role with this company.
Indiana Jones was a professor for a University, but he also went on Expeditions to find rare artifacts and would give them to a Museum. Well you'd be doing the same exact thing.
University Company Specials
1* spend 1 Job Point to reduce EDU time by 1 half hour
3* 2% decrease in travel times when flying abroad
5* 10% more points when exchanging with Museum
7* 50% to Awareness
Now 10* is the game changer and what makes this company and work worth your while
10* Unlocks Expedition, spend 20 Job Points to receive a random event. This event could give you a random artifact, nothing, fake artifact worth little money, or items like ww2 helm and spears or scimitars and other melee weapons and armor like a Medieval Helmet.
There is a chance that one top of your random event you can gain battle stats to a random stat for you Expedition, this will coast 50 energy IF you have the 50 energy. If you use your Job Points at 0 or below 50 energy, this extra event will not trigger.
This new company would give players an incentive to not only run a company but join a course they might not have ever thought about joining.
Also, me personally having completed the History courses have found that artifact spawns are so few and far between, that having another way of possibly finding more artifacts would make completing the course more desirable. Of course it will still be very difficult and time consuming to find artifacts using this company, but knowing there is another way would make it worth it.
I don't know if they go hand in hand with this thread https://www.torn.com/forums.php#/p=threads&f=19&t=16175565&b=0&a=0, but the City Shops are not restocking, the same as Races are not starting.
I do believe an event should be made when Battle Stat perks are changed for training. This will ensure the members are optimizing their trains and we all get stronger faster.
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