Bar Torn City [CLOSED]

I love those games!

You sent 25x Kitten Plushie to Shinemaster with the message: Hulk Smash

You sent 25x Kitten Plushie to MrLuna with the message: Hulk Smash

Request 25 , cheers !

Request 25 please

#candygirl

#hulklikeskittens

ty! :)

Request 25 beeeer

#candygirl

#hulklikeskittens

From the makers of #JamzforJonasty... we present...

#JokezForJonasty!

Friends, I'm in need of a good laugh... so I thought Bar Torn City would be the perfect spot to host an open mic Comedy Slam!

Post your best jokes, funny stories, or silly anecdotes and make me (and the bar) laugh! Puns will be tolerated.

Scared to get up in front of a crowd? Participate by rating the jokes!

Prizes:

1) Every entrant will receive 10 bottles of champagne

2) Most up-voted will receive 250 beers and a Lotto Voucher

3) Random prizes based on creativity and/or hilarity may be given out.

 

Rules:

1) Let's keep it semi-classy and refrain from racist/ misogynistic/ overtly abusive jokes... Also, stay within all basic forum rules.. Otherwise, give me your best!. Feel free to make it Torn specific - throw a lob at Ched or drop a bomb on Duke if you want

2) You can submit as many jokes as you want but only the first two will be eligible for prizes.

3) Not super interested in memes... These will not count (even if they're hilarious)...

4) Comedy Slam will go until new day - 08/04/2018. Final upvote counts will be counted around New day 08/05/2018...

5) Make sure to tag your submissions with #JokezforJonasty

Have Fun!!

You sent a Lollipop to spaghettisword with the message: Compliments from the bar :)

 

You sent a Lollipop to Shinemaster with the message: Compliments from the bar :)

You sent 3x Lollipop to MrLuna with the message: Compliments from the bar :)

You sent a Lollipop to Caya with the message: Compliments from the bar :)

1) Let's keep it semi-classy and refrain from racist/ misogynistic/ overtly abusive jokes... Also, stay within all basic forum rules

 

So you dont want us telling jokes?

 

You sent a Lollipop to Yaminos with the message: Compliments from the bar :)

You sent 25x Kitten Plushie to Caya with the message: Hulk Smash

You sent 25x Kitten Plushie to Yaminos with the message: Hulk Smash

#JokezForJonasty 

Two hillbillies walk into a restaurant. While having a bite to eat, they talk about their moonshine operation. Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to cough. After a minute or so, it becomes apparent that she is in real distress. One of the hillbillies looks at her and says, 'Kin ya swallar?' The woman shakes her head no. Then he asks, 'Kin ya breathe?' The woman begins to turn blue, and shakes her head no. The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up her dress, yanks down her drawers, and quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick with his tongue. The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm, and the obstruction flies out of her mouth.As she begins to breathe again, the Hillbilly walks slowly back to his table. His partner says, 'Ya know, I'd heerd of that there 'Hind Lick Maneuver' but I ain't niver seed nobody do it!'

#JokezforJonasty

Iron Man is a superhero.

Iron Woman is a command.

#JokezforJonasty

 

A blind guy walks in a bar. He sits down at the bar orders a beer. "Hey barkeep, wanna hear a blonde joke?" The lady next to him pipes up. 

"Excuse me sir but before you tell your joke you must know that my boyfriend and I are both blonde cops. The bartender is also blonde and keeps a 12 gauge shotgun behind the bar. The man on your other side is blonde and owns the boxing club next door. Not to mention the bouncer is blonde and he is standing right behind you. Do you still want to tell that joke?"

The blind guy moves his head around a little. " Not if I have to explain it 5 times"

NOTE.. Not sure I wrote the joke right so I dont hate me if it sucks.

Edit I start another of those map mini games. Come join

Request 25

#candygirl

#hulklikeskittens

Request 25

#candygirl

#hulklikeskittens

Thanks all!