Disability Torn Players

Hello

Are there any players here who have disabilities? Whether it be physical or mental? I would like to talk to those who may have disabilities as I find it a lot easier to fit in with others who have a disability like myself or understand disabilities and care for them.

Torn is a game that I've made a few friends on (and unfortunately a lot of enemies) but it helps with my socializing as I struggle with socializing in real life and that in part is due to being anxious but also due to being autistic on the higher functioning end.

For me personally, I just want to fit in with everyone else. It can be hard though, especially when I'm not a 100% well liked player and am relatively new. I'm not fishing for empathy, I'm just honestly fishing for friends on Torn and also to connect with those who have had struggles with their own personal disability.

I try not to limit myself just because I have autism and I prefer referring to disability as unique or removing the dis.

As a suicide survivor, disability advocate, autistic, and someone who has had a rough life, I'd really like to connect with others who have disabilities or, in fact, struggle with mental health and I'd love to hear your stories so I know I'm not alone in having a rough life. Spent half of my childhood in what America would call CPS.

Anyways, if you're a Torn Player and you struggle with your disability, mental health or have had just a rough life, feel free to pm me and we can have a nice wee friendly chat or comment below and I'll read and like your comment.

Have a wonderful day.

Kindest Regards

Shockwave

I sincerely hope this post doesn't bring a barrage of insensitivity and attacks against you. Torn has a lot of people who enjoy mocking disability or dismissing people's mental health.

I am profound deaf in both ears and I use American Sign Language to communicate, went to a deaf institution as a child, and eventually transferred to a public school with a deaf program. Being deaf is free because I get to have ssi, free healthcare, food stamps, etc.

anyone who plays Torn, has a mental disability

Hey Shockwave,

I hope all is well in your daily life! I personally suffer from I'd say moderate anxiety that goes from not wanting to go out to just being awkward as f**k speaking to people though characteriscally I'm a very confident person.. idk how it works but it's a mental thing.

You don't need to connect with people on the 'same level' as yourself or even myself, most people on this game are friendly and approachable. Even if someone has some sort of physical disability or mental differences, you're best connecting with everyone regardless of the above. It's not the same as making friends IRL but I've found myself logging in for around 4 years constantly and find new 'faces' everyday, mainly connecting with the usual people I consider friends.

Always welcome to pop up to me, likewise to others. I am not a doctor or a psychologist though I'm good with words and I hope my experiences and that of those that has commented can show you that despite your 'irregularities' you are human like the other 8 billion people on this planet...

Best Wishes,
Rabbit

i second that.
also my skull was born the wrong way, does that count as a disability?

Hey Shockwave,

Glad you could join us in Torn, and I hope your post encourages those with mental or physical disabilities!

I do find that it takes a very specific type of person to enjoy Torn in it's entirety, and I think that each and every one of us who is here ultimately is pretty special in their own way.

Don't worry to much about not being liked, as for the most part there'll only be a select few that you'll truly connect with. However it will come with time, so don't give up too soon!

Feel free to reach out if you ever need advice, I'm pretty much around 24/7

Good luck and have fun!

Mob

Hey, im writing from mobile rn so my story will be very shortened. Im almost 20 now, got my anxiety attacks since 16 or 17 when i started travelling by train to my ex-gf who lived at the other side of country, i mean it wasnt that bad at the time and we spent some very quality time together back then. Still got pictures of her at my desk etc., broke our relationship because the thing was i cant be with someone less intelligent than im, and i know you might think its stupid but it took me two years to realise, after all i still do love her as a kind person she is, never blamed her for anything or so. Firstly it started by low anxiety attack at bus when going to school, but it happened only once and wasnt something i would care about because atm ive thought im too strong for something like this, then my mind did shown me that i can be exposed for some serious shit and my anxiety went worse when i was using subway in my city, i didnt gave a f so just went thru without it, always used buses etc., my thoughts was always (how i can even breathe underground, how i can escape if train stops at any time underground - there is no escape!) same thoughts kicked into trains, so i started to travel to my gf by the bus, one time i was coming back home after crying that im leaving her (it was also my first cryin over a girl, found myself empathic this time), got strong anxiety attack (still reason was no escape, bus must roll to my city, no comin back), somehow still managed to think im fully healthy and just went thru it like nothing happened. Got myself into university ive always dreamt of, got a wellpaid job that ive really enjoyed, but also at the time ive started to take benzodiazepines, one time after wakin up and getting into train to travel to my job i got my strongest anxiety attack, im living in Warsaw for all my life, this time i got no clue where even im, is everything real, i needed to grab something just to hold myself, my heart was going also very fast, i can describe it only like the agony state, first time i thought i was about to die, came to home by taxi and never shown up at work again cuz i couldnt even move anymore by myself around the city, always someone needed to drive me to place, but i didnt wanted to give up on school because it was something really important, i was taking benzodiazepines for a while now - alprazolam (xanax), lorazepam, clonazepam, zolpidem, mixing it up sometimes with alcohol, so all the time i was about to get somewhere out even near my home (around 50metres) i needed to be high af, otherwise i knew my anxiety would kick in again, someday i just couldnt go to school anymore because of it, even if i was high - just cried myself a lot and told my grandparents i cant do this anymore, im paralyzed, i cant move from my home - its called agoraphobia. They never could accept me after that, they love me to the death but they cant accept my sickness. Got myself into other drugs but never really fw them, like - tried once, okay, fine, but my benzodiazepines were still on place, i was taking whole lot of them, one time i wanted to go to see my idol musicians so badly i have overdosed af on them but nothing happened, mixed it up with alcohol and went to afterparty with the artists, where ive smoked really strong weed, drank 8 beers and sniffed two lines of 4-cmc, no joke i dont know how but i still managed to stand on my legs and come home at the morning using trams, when i woke up i realised what ive just done and spent about two hours cryin why im still alive, next time ive done around same amount of benzodiazepines, mixed it up with vodca and about eight lines of mephedrone, i couldnt even eat - my teeth was so in pain, but damn, same repeat after waking up this time, same thoughts, there are a lot of story to carry over this party but my fingers are getting fatigued and i dont want to lose my post after refreshing page. Yeah, i was streaming games, making music and all, but ive attempted suicide three times at streams where people would crowd to it before i were almost dying. Didnt care anymore about anything around me, didnt knew why im here and for what. Yeah, im at therapy for a year now, still using benzos, it gave me somehow skill to travel around 500m around my house placed near Warsaw (or the daily pills did - paroxetine + pregabalin, idk) i got no friends here, just me, two cats, my mom and her partner that i hate. Im trapped in my own room, got myself into deep deppresion, i cant sometimes even brush my teeth or dress up, all my happiness from making music and playing pc games just went down, im at the point blank, got myself into NA groups too (narcotic anonymous, something like that), it helped me a little for now, was clean for two weeks at maximum, trying my best but somedays i just cant even exist without taking drugs, ive made around 300 songs in six years, i still suck at it, got feeling like i should pass away soon, stay strong, love yall and wish you that my inner angel can help everybody else get out of their weaknesess and other things you hate about yourself, i really do - really love you, and i need to thank you for everything youve done and can do, no matter what. Energy doesnt die, my mom is alcoholic and benzo addict, my dad and her divorced at 2004, he stole all money and went to somebody else just to drink and take stimulants like amphetamine, my grandfather is alcoholic, my grandma is the only one who held it everything together fr, energy doesnt die and someday ill share more of the story, thank you for reading, its 5am, still no sleep.

Hey Reinoldini,

f**k man. That's a hell of a long story and some hell you've been through. Take this from someone that knows. 1 side of my family is normal and the other side can be described as your father, though alot worse. The thing is with addiction is we don't know how severe it is until it's on our doorstep.

I just read your line saying that you might pass away soon... without trying to be a dick but in your best interests, why be so selfish to your family and yourself? You know yourself there is more to life than the life you have lived, we're either born into a sophisticated, educated and rich family or perhaps a poverty ridden family. That doesn't mean we can't strive for success in life? Most millionaires are self made. In terms of money they've worked really f**king hard. Money doesn't bring happiness you're right, but think about when people that have genuinely started with f**k all and made something of themselves. You have worth to this planet you may not think that but let me assure you you've got something worth living for!!

You are worth more than you are showing so don't give up.. Find some goals and work hard at them. Take your attention off your daily problems, find problems of your own and solve them

Wish you the best of health and hope you're here for eternity :-)

Im fat.

im pretty sure this goes in general non related or health and fitness non related, but it doesnt matter. This thread was way overdue and tysm from everyone :)

i have a failing heart so i cant get out much anymore,tons of daily medicne pacemaker all that shit

I had the good grace to be born with perfect health. I am lucky. The worst that I can say is that I grew up having my head slammed into walls for being little. Oh well right? We all have our burdens don't let them get you down :) Screw the trolls lol

sending my love and hugs for everyone here! even if i have a brother who is disabled too, i can't fathom the challenges you guys have to endure everyday. I'm always down to talk if anyone wants to. let's keep swimming <3

My friend was the same though he opted to ignore advice... and has ended up in hospital near death with 2 kids on the planet.. Props to you for staying drug free unlike my unfortunate friend and I hope you live a long, stressful and less burdened life. Need more people like you that recognise they have problems whether it be physical or mentally and understand your limits as a human.. Not everyone can be an athlete, or a gym enthusiast. Shitty cards we've been dealt, just got to hope we Stand and hit blackjack brother, best of health mate! <3

im sorry to hear that about your friend, may he rest in peace.

taking help and accepting that i had a serrious problem took a long time for me to, its not some you want to accept when you are young. i was only 25 years when they implanted a pacemaker in my heart. so studies, work social pretty much everything became a huge steps to high for me to climb and you decend into dark places of your mind

but l have come to terms with it and im happy, i conserve and use what energy i can muster for my little daughter.

32 now btw

As someone who is on disability for PTSD, I know how hard it can be to even open up and admit to being disabled. I don't see myself as broken, or less than others, yet...to label myself disabled sure does make me feel less than. I have trust issues, and I can't be too social in person. I suppose we all have our own quirks.

You certainly aren't alone.

Yes I have a paralytic hand andd 120p vision Can’t read anything iPad Accessibility is a small miracle

I'm honestly fascinated, and I don't mean to and I am sorry if I cause offence here. But, how did you manage to learn how to spell etc? We have it "easy" cause we can hear the letters and words that we spell out, but obviously with sign language and being deaf, you can't hear each syllable. Again, I don't mean to cause offence, and you don't have to answer!

I have a very short attenti...